Deadly epidemic of domestic violence harms Kansans. We can’t tolerate its spread.

A bulletin board at KU's Blake Hall, which includes the Gender and Sexualities Department, includes information for those suffering from domestic violence. (Maya Smith for Kansas Reflector)

Something deadly is happening all over the world, as well as Kansas. That something deadly is domestic violence.

Too often, women are abused emotionally or physically or both by their partners. Sometimes, women are the abusers. Whatever the case, domestic violence is horrible and it should stop.

My wonderful and beautiful grandma in Kingfisher, Oklahoma, endured domestic violence. She was married to my wonderful grandpa, my father’s father, until he passed away due to a heart attack. Then she married a farmer in Kingfisher and the hell began.

He hurt her over and over. At one point, we went shopping for a wig for her because he ripped out almost all of her hair. I really didn’t understand what was happening in that house on the farm. Finally, she moved into town in a small home someone provided for her. She was safe. I was thankful she was safe.

Abuse is wrong. There are too many men who are into their power and they exert it on their partners who are only trying to live their life. The counselors at the YWCA truly help these many women and they offer hope and healing for women in battered situations.

No one deserves domestic violence. No one deserves to be hit or demeaned or belittled. No one deserves that.

It’s also a spiritual issue. Domestic violence is also spiritual abuse. A woman may never see her relationship with God in a positive way after having been beaten or mistreated.

Our nation is at a crisis point. People are just plain cruel. They are mean spirited, and they are abusive. They run people off the road in their big monster trucks, and they scream at people in the drive through. Tempers are high, and anger is evident. People are stressed out. Too many people are taking that anger out on their partners.

The economy is terrible. Maybe someone lost his job and he comes home and takes out his anger on his wife and children. The pain is so real. It makes me furious and sad.

I have a friend who used to be in an abusive relationship. She is so kind and loves people. When I think of her being mistreated, it angers me. To get out of abusive relationships is very difficult. Too many times, the abusive partner is also financially abusive, and if the wife leaves, she loses her income. This is very challenging.

How can we reach out and help these abused partners? I feel like we can listen and offer a place to stay if that is safe. We can donate to the YWCA and other nonprofit organizations that help women in need. We can pray. We can be a friend. We can offer a listening ear.

Domestic violence is a stain on the moral fabric of America. This anger that is blazing through our cities must stop. Women are not sex objects or punching bags. The time is now to reach out and help these abused partners. Let’s start the healing.

Rebecca Lyn Phillips is a published author, speaker and mental health advocate. Through its opinion section, the Kansas Reflector works to amplify the voices of people who are affected by public policies or excluded from public debate. Find information, including how to submit your own commentary, here.